My Job As a Mom

As a mother, my job is to take care of the possible and trust God with the impossible.

Welcome to Fall

The start of a new year, better yet a new school yet-brings with it an opportunity. You can either keep doing what you’ve done in the past (whether it’s worked well or not). Or you can take stock, take charge, and try something new. I am so excited every year for fall. It is by far my favorite time of the year. School starts with new friends, teachers, and ideas. And let’s face it – who doesn’t love a new box of crayons? Best of all, Pumpkin Spice everything is here!

However each year as fall arrives there is the inevitable increase of time constraints that begin to arise as the pressure of schedules, homework and extracurricular activities begin to mount and sometimes topple off balance in our society. The big picture here is what your children will remember years down the road – you driving them all over town for practices and lessons, or the giant hug they receive when you pick them up from school each day?

Working with a group of parents a few years ago, I found that many parent’s really struggled to spend time with their kids and connect. This becomes especially prevalent as children get older and schedules increase. Plus, let’s face it, with this day in age we have many challenges – often two full-time jobs, double incomes or career paths, the Internet in every room of the house, video games and android phones, just to name a few. So I made it my quest to find ways to perhaps challenge the societal norm. I will be the first to admit that my 6 and 7 year each have a cellphone and a TV in their room. But guess what else they have? A really dedicated mom. I plan and I organize. I don’t want life to pass us by. I refuse to let any opportunity to create memories slip by.

I challenge you to treat your children like the small adults they are to one day become. I make it a point once every couple of months to take my kids out to Starbucks. I make it a special “date” to go one on one. I try to set up a playdate for one child and then take the other one for a short shopping trip and a Starbucks. My daughter loves the double chocolate chip Frappuccino. My son loves to get warm milk with a shot of flavoring – pumpkin spice in the fall, peppermint in winter, etc. Sit them down at a table and speak to them one on one. Encourage them and listen to their thoughts and concerns. One of my favorite quotes comes from Catherine M. Wallace – “If you don’t listen eagerly to the little stuff when they are little, they won’t tell you the big stuff when they are big, because to them all of it has always been big stuff.” Don’t stop there. Make it a point to follow up on comments or concerns in the future so they know you really were listening to what they had to say.

Another chance to spend quality time is to get the kids involved in the kitchen. My kids have always loved to cook and “create” and in fact, we will be coming out with our own cookbook later this year! I like to use Trader Joe’s because we can use the small shopping carts to zip around the store. NOTE: I do not recommend you do your large shopping trip with the kids ever, but simply take them to the store to pick up a few “fresh” items, or better yet, encourage them to pick out the veggies themselves. I also highly recommend a set of kitchen tools designed for kids by the company “Curious Chef” which even offers knives made for fruit and veggie prep that won’t cut skin. The kids and I enjoy cranking up the music in the kitchen, chopping up veggies and creating a dinner all our own. With this experience also comes added responsibility – cleaning up, setting the table, and washing the dishes all become part of the gig. All in a day’s work.

If time is really not on your side – I know for me this happens around the holidays working at a church – find time to write a special note. Pin it to the bathroom mirror, inside their favorite book, in their backpack or lunchbox. On a few occasions I have even dropped off little “thinking of you” bags on their desk at school if I happen to be on that side of town.

Finally, I leave you with one final thought on time –  to seize the moment. Perfect attendance is not a lifelong goal for most of us. Take the day off school and do something crazy with the kids when popular locations aren’t crowded. Hit the zoo, the slopes, or even the movie theater. That one day could mean the world to them.

It’s never too late to start over. If you weren’t happy with yesterday, try something different today. Don’t stay stuck. Do better.